F3 First Merlot Record Holder

F3 First Merlot Record Holder

Workout Date:

05/17/2018

QIC:

Beaker

PAX:

Beaker, Burgundy (Possible FNG, you decide)

The Thang:

YHC is asserting he holds the F3 record for earliest #spilledMerlot in a F3 workout.  The evidence is abundant and outlined below.

#Tclaps to Bluegrass for posting his beast of a workout on Facebook.  It certainly was an elephant that needed to be digested appropriately.

#Tclaps for Burgundy for showing up in the wind and pelting rain (which actually was great given the workout. )

CLAIM: YHC holds the official F3 record for #firstmerlot (earliest recorded merlot in a workout)

BACKGROUND:  AT 5:15 Burgundy and YHC has started the disclaimer when a Lyft van (with lightup LYFT marker in the window) rolls up to the curb and stops abruptly.  YHC is thinking “Down Range (DR) PAX” The PAX opens the door and performs 1/2 an exercise and spills Merlot while COP ensues.  After some more cadence exercising and a few 10 counts the door shuts and The Lyft driver then takes the “FNG” off to a beachfront hotel.  The entire incident was witnessed by YHC and an ordained minster.  A search warrant for the LYFT server containing GPS and driver data is being signed by a judge as we speak to validate the above claim.

COUNTERCLAIM #1:  The “FNG” never posted.  Haters would say that it doesn’t count as it was just some drunk college kid whose late night shenanigans caught up with him on the way home.  YHC believes that evidence  supports otherwise.  Point 1: The FNG clearly told the driver to stop at the AO.  This was witnessed as the angle of approaching minivan dipped suddenly nose first as the driver applied the breaks near the AO.  The sound of the ABS braking system engaging was also heard.  Point 2: The FNG was clearly at the AO and was no farther than 25yrds from the SF.  Point 3: The FNG had both feet out of the van and clearly planted on the ground.

COUNTERCLAIM #2: The “FNG” never began the workout.  Skeptics would claim that the FNG never began the workout and was ill prior to arriving for being out all night with is friend Jack chasing Wild Turkeys.  However it was clearly witnessed that the FNG exited a vehicle and began the downward motion of a Good Morning.  He then followed the F3 practice of modifying as necessary in the downward position and began to do cat stretches (rounding of the back) in cadence.  However, we were unable to determine if he was counting in IC 2ct or 4ct as he was yelling a mixture of Hebrew and German as he exercised.  After 1 rep of said exercise the Merlot ensued.

COUNTERCLAIM #3:  Since the FNG was not able to participate in name-o-rama, it is not an official post.  YHC would argue that the FNG clearly introduced himself as “Ralph”  and even let us know he was looking to go into the Buick resale business after he finished school.  Many a PAX has been named in absentia and therefore precedence has been set.

The Thang:

Thanks to Bluegrass for the brutal idea.  We were able to only get through 60% of the BOMBS but mixed in the other elements to break up the monotony as we divided the BOMBS count into quarters.

15 SSH IC

15IW IC

Run to beach

BOMBS (1/4 at a time , 60% completion)

  • 100 Burpees
  • 150 Oblique Crunches
  • 200 Merkins
  • 250 BBS
  • 300 Squats

Doracides: (Run to water line backpedal to soft sand line on low tide)

  • a) Iron Mike
  • b) Superstars (skipped, demo needed)
  • c) Low Country crab

Flutter kicks 30X IC (needed some more reps added to make it worth it)

15X AH IC

Called on time.

Mosey back to AO start.

YHC prayed us out.

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